Thursday, June 7, 2012

For Sleep’s Sake

Stone Age man was once really bored. It was late in the evening and he didn’t know what to do, now that it was getting dark. For some odd reason, he could not sleep. Scantily clothed and messy hair dropping to his shoulders, he sat by a boulder. He fidgeted with his bare hands to pick up a pair of odd-looking stones next to him and held them in each of his hands. He started rubbing them together, just to see if they take another shape or something. A few strokes; and heat and light flickering were almost instant. Excited, the Stone Age man does it again and the stones flickered once more. He noticed that the white semi-translucent stones gave out a sharp yellow light. Intrigued, he rubs the stone harder with short grunts and making bizarre expressions, till he sees the flashes of light again. Soon after, fire was discovered. (Contrary to the song, we did start the fire. Billy Joel was just didn’t get the memo)

Cut to today’s human (otherwise known as the Homo Sapien, but I’d rather call him metrosexual). 

He was once really bored. It was late in the night, but for some odd reason he could not sleep. Leaning against a bean bag, he sat in his boxers and looked into his white iPhone to check out his new messy hairstyle. Fidgeting with his manicured fingers, he went to the Zippo app on the phone. Lighting the zippo on and off every few seconds, he thinks, ah yellow light. When that bores him he starts playing Temple Run, making short grunts every time he has a close call, making bizarre expressions. The game ends when the guy in the game falls on his face and a sponsored ad flashes; which asks the Metrosexual to ‘DOWNLOAD SLEEP NOW’. That should be nice, he thinks and before you know it, thanks to the 3G speeds, he has already got it. Excited, the metrosexual opens the app and has to wait a few seconds before it starts running. This makes him very impatient and is already fidgeting with his hair again.

Soon the app blinks to life but asks the Metrosexual to download additional data. Worth it for sleep, the metrosexual says without batting an eyelid. ‘DOWNLOADING R.E.M.’ keeps flashing on his screen and the green progress line zaps ahead. About time, the Metrosexual huffs. ‘THE VISUAL CAPACITY OF YOUR PHONE IS HIGHER THAN THE CURRENT RESOLUTION. UPDATE NOW?’ Oh well, if I am going to spend time on it, it may as well be in hi-def! Update. ‘DOWNLOADING D.R.E.A.M.’  The iPhone blinks for not more than 2 seconds when a final message appears ‘SLEEP TIGHT’ followed by the most picturesque lush green field.

Right in the middle of the field is a long wooden fence. Soon a sheep appears on screen and before you know it, jumps the fence. Another one, and then another. The metrosexual is mesmerized by the visuals- the moving skies, the grass blades slightly tilting left to right, the odd bunch of flowers, the ‘baaaaa…’ of the sheep if you touch them…There was even a settings icon if you wanted to slow the process of the sheep jumping over the fence. If you were too tired, then activate the counter that counts the number of sheep jumping over the fence. Soothing music can play – preloaded or from your music library. The weather can change, as well as the time of the day.

The metrosexual didn’t sleep at all that night. Neither did the Stone Age man.

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